Good intentions

Photo from here.

It seems to me like it takes a little more than good intentions to keep my life running the way I want it to - I want a clean house, I want a happy family, I want to know where my shoes are when I am ready to walk out the door...

What I don't want is to be running around like a crazy mother the morning of show and tell because I haven't got a clue what the category for today is - and I certainly have no idea where the list that tells me is!!!

The house?

I feel like I can spend an entire week scrubbing my house like the perfectionist I am, weeding the gardens, washing the curtains, cleaning the light switches, unpacking and organising kitchen cupboards...

And then 3 days later?

Absolute chaos!

What am I doing wrong???

The worst part of all? I still have one room in my house that hasn't been unpacked since we moved into this house in April - boxes were dumped there and the door was closed and now the room is an absolute shambles. A half sorted bookcase, boxes still unopened, and craft supplies balancing on top of every surface that's showing... I call it my 'shut door' room.

I took 'before' photos of that room this morning - it was supposed to motivate me to get going in there and be productive so that I could final conquer it. But then I decided to just check something real quick on Facebook before I started - and 3 hours later I am still sitting here...

Sigh!!

I am so tired of it - all the good intentions I have are doing jack all for me. I write to do lists, I write down the my goals, I write down a timetable for the day so I can plan and be productive, I force myself into action and spend the day getting things done - but then when I turn my back for one moment it all falls apart.

Am I ever going to be able to actually get organised?

Are these lovely organising blogs I read all make believe? Because IT DOESN'T WORK WHEN I DO IT!!!!!

Ok, rant over.

I better get up and get something done - right after I just check one last thing on Facebook real quick.

I'm back!!

It's been almost a year since the last time I posted on this blog - at the moment I honestly can't even remember a year ago! It's really scary how fast life passes you by if you don't sit back and appreciate it along the way.

So very much has happened in the last year but this little one has definitely been the main event!



Isn't she just delicious!!!

Motherhood the second time around has been awesome - everything seems a little easier (including the dreaded 2am feed!). I have been able to bask in her newborn awesomeness this time around - my first newborn experience was just tainted with moody outbursts and exhaustion. It's so wonderful to have a newborn in the house - it's just made our little family that much more perfect - bless!

I've really missed writing in a blog, just like I always miss having a journal in my bedside table. I stopped feeling comfortable writing things down at some point - probably got sick of getting busted by Mum after she'd found my awesome hiding spot and read all of my rebellious confessions when I was a hardcore, know-it-all teenager.

I can't wait to write in here properly again - it's going to be great! Xx

Creative mojo

What on earth inspired me to attempt to reignite my creative mojo for the silly season?

I'm making an advent calendar - easy peasy, right? I thought it was going to be.

This is just ridiculous. I have no idea what I'm doing.

I suppressed my excuse of creative flair a long time ago when I decided the world will be a better place without me prancing around pretending that I have talent at something.

I have stabbed myself, burnt myself, almost thrown the sewing machine out the window, and have just banned miss 5 from coming within 3 meters of me - she thinks the pins are some kind of amazing treasure and has taken to hiding them around the house. Which means most will either end up stuck into feet (not her feet of course!) or sucked up the vacuum. Sigh!

Why do I keep trying to be creative? Because I can't cook. What kind of housewife am I if I can't cook OR sew?

A shit one - that's what.

So I'll keep ploughing along here - even if I end up with half a finger or half a brain - so that when Christmas decorations go up in a few weeks I will have proof - hanging there on my wall - that at least I can fake being a good housewife.

And then I'll take it down again to hide in a box for 11 months.

Aiming high

I've been working in a post for a whole now about what my goals are - it's not working for me and I've decided that I don't have any, except being happy...

I don't really care which bits jiggle when I'm walking - or if my hair looks like shit at school pick up - or what people think of my parenting skills when Miss 5 starts cracking it in the waiting room at the doctors.

I do care how I feel inside though - and I want to be enjoying myself no matter what.

So I don't have any goals at the moment.

Life's too short and all that bullshit.

Begin again

Well I got some interesting news yesterday - looks like my parenting journey has just started for a second time!

I'm all confused about how to feel - excited, overwhelmed, scared?

It worried me that I am not living the life I want to have before I'm bringing another child into this world - and that is something that I really want to change.

I want to be in control of my surroundings - I want the house to be overflowing with happiness - I want order and security - I want love and respect.

I've tried to apply structure to this household and get things organised before but it's never stuck - maybe this is just the motivation I need!!!

Day 2

So, yesterday was not a complete success. It was going really well... until dinner time. Little miss had a birthday party after school so we didn't get home until almost 6 - which I decided was enough of an excuse to eat pre-health kick left overs that were in the fridge. So then because I had already stuffed up, what was the point of stopping there, right?

So I started fresh again today - warm lemon water, then organic fruit juice and yummy nut paste on toast for breakfast. Right now I am having a green tea and the best peach EVER!! And I've already planned the perfect salad for lunch.

I am thinking about how I am using excuses to get myself off my journey already - honestly, it wouldn't have taken me any longer to make a salad for dinner last night than it did to heat up left overs - so why didn't I do it?

I have no idea.

Because I didn't want to I guess.

Maybe it's because I haven't got specific goals? I might need to do something about that...

The beginning.

Today is day one of my own personal health kick - my goal is to treat my body like a temple (and hopefully reap some other rewards along the way).

I've just done my weigh in and measurements - I still haven't decided if I'm willing to post them up on the world wide web in all of their glory. We'll have to wait and see about that one.

I'm honestly not really focused on losing weight at the moment though (even though that sounds like a cop out), I want to be healthy - I want my daughter to see me being healthy! And plus, life is too short to live cooped up inside stuffing your face with donuts.

I am using the 15 day detox program by totally natural, with a strong focus on what I'm eating. I don't know what I'll do after the 15 days - let me just survive these first!

This morning has started with a glass of warm water with lemon - followed 20 minutes later with a glass of fresh vegetable juice and a piece of rye bread with avocado, tomato and basil on it - DELISH!!!!

Here's to a happy first day!